Death of Nuance
Remember when people could disagree without needing to burn each other at the stake? These days it feels like nuance has completely left the building!
When you scroll through a comments feed you notice that it’s all or nothing. Black or white. You’re either with us or against us. And heaven forbid you say something that doesn’t pass through everyone’s internal filter exactly as you meant it – because offence is lurking around every corner, ready to pounce.
The Filter Nobody Talks About
Everything we hear or read passes through our own filter first. Past wounds, old beliefs, current mood, subconscious programming – all of it shapes how we interpret what lands in our ears.
So when someone says something and you feel a spark of offence? Nine times out of ten, that’s your filter talking. It doesn’t mean the other person was cruel or malicious. It means your inner world coloured the message before it even landed.
But instead of owning that, we project it outward. “You offended me” has become code for “you’re responsible for my filter.”
Nuance and Curiosity Is a Lost Art
We’ve lost the middle ground. Where’s the curiosity? Where’s the compassion to ask: “What did you mean by that?” or “Tell me more about where you’re coming from”?
Instead, we leap to conclusions, slap on a label, and add another log to the outrage fire. It’s lazy. It’s reactive. And it’s choking the life out of honest, meaningful conversation. We have lost nuance!
Responsibility Is Sexy
Here’s a rebellious thought: what if we took responsibility for how we receive things? What if, before choosing offence, we checked in with our own filter?
That doesn’t mean we let genuinely harmful behaviour slide – discernment matters. But it does mean we stop treating every uncomfortable moment as a personal attack.
Because discomfort is where growth happens. It’s where we meet ideas that stretch us, challenge us, and show us the edges of our own conditioning. If we cancel every voice that doesn’t sing in our exact key, we silence the very conversations that could change us.
The Sacred Rebel View
Real communication needs courage. The courage to speak your truth with integrity – and the courage to listen without assuming you’ve already got the whole story.
Nuance isn’t dead. We’ve just stopped practising it. But if we want genuine connection, if we want compassion, if we want a world where people can actually hear each other again, we have to bring it back.
So next time you feel that spark of offence rise, pause. Ask yourself: is this really about them, or is this about my filter?
That pause? That choice? That’s where your power lives.
